Still, I felt like an outsider. I'm not "one of them", and the question is: Is that a bad thing, or a good thing? Anyway, I'm still Belgian, but sometimes I feel Dutch. And that is not always a good thing. But is it any better to be Belgian? I doubt it. I mean, my country is a very complicated one. It has three official languages - right, Dutchies, three, not two as the majority of you think ;) - and probably therefore is so incredibly incoherent. We are not ONE, while I have the impression that in the Netherlands, people act more together and there is less rivalry. In Belgium, we not only have the cultural difference between the Flemings and the Walloons, but there's also the language problem. I regret the fact that the majority of the Walloons see Dutch as an inferior language. The consequence is that they refuse to speak it, even in a big city like Brussels. And that's a pity, for it shows that there is little respect from the French speaking community for the Dutch speaking community. So I'm not proud of being a Belgian, and that's what makes me toy with the idea of becoming Dutch. It shouldn't be that complicated. I'm a European citizen and I've been living here for almost 10 years. I speak the language, although maybe with a funny accent I can't hide. I don't need a citizenship course, although I'll have to do something about my distaste of cheese, liquorice and treacle waffles ;) But I hate bureaucracy, and I'm afraid it will take a lot of paperwork, let alone money, to become a Dutch citizen.
Why would I want to become Dutch anyway? I do like the majority of my Dutch friends, but some Dutch people can be so rude sometimes, even people you don't know at all. They have no fear of asking you direct questions or telling you you're doing something wrong (in their opinion that is, and sometimes it makes sense, but not always). We Belgians stick more to ourselves. We are more modest, I think, and that can be a bad thing, too, I realise that. We don't always say what we think. Also, I think we are more polite than the Dutch. Still, I admire the country I'm living in in many ways. On a day like today, you see the oneness, the solidarity among people. Everyone is having a good time, and they don't begrudge each other. In Belgium, there is a lot of rivalry among the provinces, especially when it comes to the different dialects we speak. And I don't like that at all. I really hate it when people discriminate each other or make fun of each other because of the fact that they speak different dialects or come from other provinces and thus have different backgrounds.
In fact, when I think about it, I'd better become a mix of a Belgian and a Dutch person. Fact is that here in the Netherlands, people see me as a Belgian, and back home, family and friends see me as Dutch. So I'm having this small identity crisis right now. I admire the Belgians for their courage and their motivation to accomplish things, but I admire the Dutch for their oneness and their sincerity. So, people, what should I do? Have you got any suggestions? One thing for sure is that I'll just stay myself. Maybe that helps. And one day, I'll figure out what I want. One day, I'll make up my mind. Promised.
