I might be wrong, but depression seems to be quite a hype nowadays. Only a couple of months ago, the Dutch television dedicated an entire week to depression with all kinds of TV shows and programs. They even organized a huge "deprestival". Is this wrong? No, I don't think it's wrong and either way, who am I to judge? But when I was diagnosed with depression - a looooong time ago, that's true - quite the opposite was true. Depression was a burden, a scandal even. People with a depression had to be locked away, they were different in such a sense that that difference couldn't be tolerated in society. Also, people with a depression weren't taken seriously by their family and friends. So it's good that finally, people recognize that depression is a mental illness that has te be taken seriously. Also, more and more people see that depression is a life-threatening disease. Unfortunately, I have lost too many people already, and it's been on the news so many times: famous rock stars and actors who somehow lose hope and decide to end their lives by committing suicide.
I want to invite you to Google the word "depression" and then have a look at the pictures page. What do you see? I'll post a couple of the pictures I found there.
You can already see what these pictures all have in common: darkness, loneliness, hopelessness. Fair enough, that's what people with a depression experience when they're going through the most difficult time of their lives. However, in reality, depression looks more like this, believe it or not:
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| Robin Williams |
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| Chester Bennington |
Who would expect that these two beautiful men decided to end their lives? They never gave any sign to the people they loved that they were unhappy. Consequently, their deaths came as an unpleasant surprise to the people around them. The picture of Chester Bennington was only taken two days before he ended his life. Can you believe it?
Those of you who have read my blogposts before will know that I've lost a few friends to suicide. When I say "a few", I actually mean "too many". I don't have pictures of all of them, but I'll post pictures of three sweet friends of mine that have accompanied me in the clinic in The Hague during one of the most difficult periods of my life. Look at these three beautiful young ladies. They show you the real face of depression.
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| Daphne |
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| Max |
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| Saskia |
Of course, I knew that my friends weren't entirely happy. They had their own problems to deal with. However, I somehow hoped that they could get enough strength and perseverance out of their friendships and their psychological treatments. Unfortunately, it turned out te be insufficient. They couldn't cope with their lives anymore. I still miss them and I think of them a lot. I often wonder how life would have been for them if they had struggled a little bit more. If they had only given life an extra chance... However, I hope that they are in a better place now. Maybe it was just a matter of time. But that doesn't mean I can't miss them.
Take-home message: Depression is not always as obvious as people think. If you suspect that a friend or family member has a depression, please be there for him/her. Before you know it, (s)he can put on this mask and act as if everything is all right. And before you know it, (s)he can be gone forever.
RIP to all those who have chosen to end their lives. I just want to tell you that you are missed very hard here on Earth...
